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[II]
Shinobu stared down at himself and let out a gurgled un-Shinobu-like scream, only to stare horrified at the pitch of his voice.
This was what came out of agreeing to strange games with strange fans!
He was a chibi-Shinobu-Cupid!! Complete with bow, arrow, wings, a toga, and horror of horrors – a high pitched voice to match!!
A steel coffee cup drops from the sky.
(Here. For you. Thought you might need it.)
He squinted up at the sky with an evil glint and reaching down, easily crushed the coffee can with one chubby hand, his gaze still directed skyward.
(Erm… Yen. Why do I get a bad feeling about this?)
(It’s okay. He can’t do anything inside our story. We’re in total control. BWAHAHAHAHA…)
(Mel sweatdrops.)
(Anyhow, back to the story.)
Shinobu dodged in between the pedestrians, his cute little pearly teeth gritted into a painful snarl and ignoring the looks that people were giving him at the sight of an adorable little lavender-haired angel with wings flitting angrily like that of a mosquito. Like water, the crowd parted almost instantaneously to make way for him, giving him access to wherever he chose to flutter. His neck craned around the busy street, searching for a familiar amber head.
There was Mitsuru!
Meantime, Mitsuru was wandering through the streets of Tokyo, idly wondering where his best friend went. One minute they were sitting by the park, and the next minute he found himself four streets away from where he started, and sans a roommate.
“Must be another fanfic author,” he said to himself, rubbing his nose. “Well, I’m glad that I’m not involved in this story for a change. The last one was enough, thank you very much.”
(Hyuk, hyuk. Little does he know...)
Mitsuru sneezed.
(Hush, Yen. He might guess. Oh look, here comes boy-cupid now.)
Right on cue, cupid-Shinobu appeared by the road, fluttering his chibi wings as fast as it could. There was Mitsuru. And all around were girls from all walks and sizes.
Piece of cake.
Shoot Mitsuru with the arrow and anybody he falls in love with would most likely be willing to kiss his bishounen friend. While normally he would prefer to stand on one side manipulating the scene, the fanfic authors had forced his hand, putting him in roles that he would normally rather not do (there were other characters drawn for the job) and thrown him in a land, where there was nobody visible to blackmail.
Yet.
But since the arrows were in his hand, and Shun and Suka had not appeared on scene yet, there was really nothing stopping him from just hitting Mitsuru with a love-arrow and getting out of this fanfic asap. And once he got out, there were a few phone calls he had to make to ensure that he would never be forced into such demeaning roles again.
He drew the bow and nocked the arrow.
He aimed.
And ---
“Oh! – look at that cute chibi!!!! Daiiski da!”
Before he knew it, the normally touch-phobic I-am-so-cool Shinobu got glomped by a few dozen girls. Not just that, glomped by girls who were intent on pulling his cheek and mussing his hair.
In front of him, Mitsuru turned around, startled by the sound behind, and could only stare as he watched a group of girls fighting over something in the center that he could not see.
Mitsuru shrugged. Junior-high girls. They were always after one strange thing or another. Best not to get involved lest he get noticed as well and be the new target of their affections. Scratching his hair, he wondered where Shinobu was.
***
Shinobu sought to comb his hair in place, occasionally glowering at the sunny sky. It had to be the fanfic writers’ version of a sick parody that caused him to be in the fix that he was in. He had finally managed to escape the clutches of the evil-innocent school-girls-from-Uchida-High and now he was safely out of sight from any possible further attacks and on the rooftop where he could see Mitsuru walking around aimlessly.
No time to waste now, better finish the job before anything else happened.
In a dazzling display of supreme archery, the arrow flew straight and true, past 3 blocks before plunging itself into Mitsuru’s back and disappearing in a shower of stardust. Shinobu leaned over the parapet as he watched his room-mate stagger slightly and then stand up slightly straighter before.
At last, Shinobu thought, a slight smile curling his lips. Now I can go home. He watched with satisfaction as Mitsuru rubbed his eyes, peering blearily at the street before resolutely walking down the street heart-shaped eyes focused ahead on a girl who stood before him, eyes open wide. He stopped in front of her and –
- hugged the lamp-post besides the girl. Shinobu sweatdropped big time as he watched his best friend swear everlasting and eternal love to the inanimate object, prompting many to stop and stare.
Shinobu stopped. Glared at the sky.
“What did you do to my best friend?” demanded the chibi cupid, cute voice dropping down to a dangerously low tone. All around, the temperature starting getting significantly colder as a howling wind appeared from nowhere, causing people to suddenly clutch their coats to ward off the chill.
(Uh well ~~ *sweatdrop* you see….)
“Change him back,” intoned cupid-Shinobu dangerously. “It’s in violation of being dangerously Out of Character.”
(But it is MY story. I can do whatever I want!! Bwahahhahaha!)
(Mel sweatdrops)
“Can you do anything about it?” asks Shinobu, inclining his head. It seemed better to try appealing to the one who was less zealous about torturing the duo.
(Sorry, she’s been like this as long as I’ve known her)
(Are you talking behind my back?!)
(Eheheh, back to the story!!! Shinobu, if you want to change Mitsuru back, shoot a black arrow at him, then you can continue with the whites.)
The scene shifted slightly and Shinobu found himself in exactly the same situation as he was before he fired that ill-fated arrow. With a slight curse about deranged fanfic authors, he pulled out another arrow and took aim.
He paused. There were more arrows than there were before.
Eyes knit in a frown, he dipped the contents of the quiver out onto the ground. There were about twenty white arrows and twenty black arrows. Attached with it was a little note. “With the option of being refilled.”
Shinobu glared at the sky.
Another can drops. (Here, I thought you might need this)
Shinobu’s eyes narrowed as he glared at the arrows.
“What is the meaning of this?”
(Oh, we gave as many arrows as we thought you would need.)
Muttering under his breath, but helpless to do anything else, Shinobu reached for the black arrow once more, undoes the spell and decides to try again. Spotting his friend staring in a mirror at a girl, he aims and fires, but to no avail, his roommate having turned away at the last minute to stare at himself in the eye.
Shinobu’s eyes widen slightly, in anticipation of the expected ill-fated consequences.
But nothing happened.
Even as he glanced suspiciously at the sky, Mitsuru casually sauntered down the road, humming tunelessly to himself, totally oblivious to the cute Chibi-Cupid flying above.
He stopped abruptly and stared at a girl standing in front of him, and for one brief moment, Shinbu allowed himself to hope.
Mitsuru flashed his patented million-megawatt-smile-guaranteed-automatic-fluttering-of-hearts-for-all-females-in-the-immediate-vicinity-of-100-miles. “I… I…”
“Yes?” prompted the girl, heart in her eyes, the mesmerizing smile having done a very good job of turning the young dynamic career woman into a slobbering pile of mush.
“I love… I love…”
“Yes?” she continued, hearts growing big enough to warrant an entire face to itself.
“I love your sunglasses! I can see myself in them. Give them to me… give give!” As Mitsuru started struggling with the girl for her Raybans, Shinobu is for once, subjected to the most unpalpable taste of frustration as he watched his normally semi-intelligent friend behave in a manner most unconducive for immediate removal of his presence from this degenerate parody.
In plain English, dumb Mitsuru = chibi-Cupid Shinobu for a longer period of time. Much longer.
Even as a blue moon popped into the sky with several swines gliding over it in a distinctly un-orvine-like way*, Shinobu gave into his frustration and kicked Mitsuru in the head. Grabbing his head and turning it around, he stares Mitsuru in the eye, waiting for the glaze to wear off.
“Shinobu?”
Enunciating very clearly, Shinobu starts, “JUST KIS…”
* Do you ever actually remember Shinobu giving into frustration?
*bing*
(Not allowed to tell subject aim and reveal oneself to subject.)
(CHEATING! Change next story!!)
<g>
*formless space*
Mitsuru looks at Shinobu.
Shinobu looks at Mitsuru.
Shinobu hits Mitsuru.
Mitsuru yelped. “What was that for?” he asked, rubbing his head, aggrieved.
“That was for being a complete moron.”
“It’s not my fault,” grumbled his roommate. “I didn’t ask to be shot by those arrows.”
Shinobu sighs and whacks him again.
“It wasn’t my fault.” Grumbled Mitsuru. “I wasn’t in total control. Those silly fanfic writers had me under control too. So what do we do now?”
Shinobu looks around him coldly.
“We wait.”
They wait in formless space for a few minutes.
Then they wait some more.
Wait again.
Wait.
Wait.
Nothing happened.
“Hello?” waved Mitsuru into the air, putting on his gigawatt best smile. “Is the torturing over yet? Can we go back to Greenwood?”
(Eh? Oh no, no, no. Shinobu cheated you see, so you can’t go back yet. We didn’t expect that stage to finish so soon.)
“Stage?”
They floated in silence.
“So what happens now?”
(Now we wait for Yen to set the stage for the next scene. Don’t worry. It won’t take long. BTW, since you broke the rule and told Mitsuru what’s going on, it has been suspended for the rest of the fic)
“So, just to make polite conversation,” remarked Mitsuru at last. “Where do you come from anyway?”
(Oh we’re from –)
(Mel, the scene’s set!!)
(Finally. I was getting tired of baby sitting.)
Mitsuru goggled. “Baby sitting.”
(Too late… It’s beginning…. BWAHAHA…)
(Erm… Yen?)
(Oh yeah… on with the show!)
* Shinobu losing his tantrum [which is probably grossly OOC -_-] can be likened to the frequency of pigs flying and moons turning blue...